Sexual Surrender

Finding Balance Between Control and Vulnerability

How embracing vulnerability can transform our most intimate connections

As I sit here crafting my dating profile, I'm struck by the complexity of what I'm trying to communicate. How do you convey that the same person who manages a business, coordinates school pickups, oversees elderly parents' care, and keeps multiple plates spinning is also someone who craves the profound relief of letting go?

This is the paradox many of us live with: we're strong, capable, and in control by day, yet yearn for something entirely different in our most intimate moments. And I’m not necessarily talking about full-blown BDSM scenes, though the dom-sub dynamic can definitely play a part.

The Weight of Always Being "On"

The reality of modern life, particularly for those of us juggling multiple responsibilities, is that we're constantly making decisions, solving problems, and maintaining control. Whether you're leading a team at work, managing a household, or caring for aging parents, the mental load is relentless.

I know this intimately. Between running my practice, solo parenting, and ensuring my parents receive the care they need, my days are filled with decisions both large and small. Add to this the ongoing work of managing my own mental health, and it becomes clear why the idea of surrender feels so appealing.

It's not just me. I've coached senior executives - people who command boardrooms and make million-dollar decisions - who confide that their greatest desire is to find spaces where they can safely let someone else take the lead. The constant pressure of responsibility creates a deep hunger for its opposite: trust, vulnerability, and the freedom that comes from letting go.

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Ready to go deeper?

This is just the beginning. Behind the paywall, I'm sharing details about the psychology of healthy surrender, building healthy connections, how I’m crafting my dating profile and being courageous in my vulnerability.

Paying subscribers also get exclusive access to:

Complete Monthly Sex Statistics and Erotic Stories: Every orgasm tracked, every pattern analysed, every breakthrough and disappointment laid bare with the kind of honest reflection you won't find anywhere else.

Behind-the-Scenes Content: The unfiltered thoughts racing through my mind during sex, the vulnerable moments I'm still processing, the revelations that surprise even me.

Extended Essays: Deep explorations of technique, relationship dynamics, and sexual philosophy that go far beyond surface-level advice.

Personal Q&A Access: Direct conversations where you can ask me anything about pleasure, relationships, and sexual wellness. While I can't respond daily, I prioritise meaningful exchanges with subscribers who are genuinely invested in this journey.

And coming up in the next three months, I'm covering the topics you've been asking about:

• What actually gets me off (spoiler: it's not what you'd expect)

• My favourite sex positions and why they work for my body

• How I masturbate: techniques, toys, and mental strategies

• My first visit to a sex club and what I learnt about myself

• My erotic archetype and how understanding it transformed my sex life

This isn't just about my journey anymore, it's about creating a space where we can explore pleasure without shame, ask difficult questions, and push boundaries together.

Join the conversation. Let's keep breaking taboos.